28 Aug
Don't pretend you haven't wished for one


Ahhh, the Japanese — always ten steps ahead of the Western world when it comes to 3 things: scat and vomit-oriented sexual fetishes (look out, Germany!), advanced robotics and all things adorably cute. Their new RIBA (“Robot for Interactive Body Assistance”) robot now combines 2 of their virtuosities into one great technological leap for the incompetently shit-faced. What is there not to like? It looks like a bear, and it carries you to bed when you polish off that fifth of tequila cos your girl left you after catching you masturbating to robot porn.

I see zero downside to this.

The RIBA is an upgrade to the original RI-MAN, and similar to the BEAR robot, only taking its name to the appropriate level. The RIBA can carry up to 135 pounds, which may work in Japan but that’s certainly not gonna carry any drunk I know. Hmmmmm, maybe it could just sweetly and gently pull me to bed by my ankles…

No Responses to “RIBA, the Human-Carrying Robot Bear”

  1. […] tasks, with little or no glory. Welding car chassis joints, sealing up gushing oil platforms, carrying rich drunks to bed. Thanks to NASA and GM that’s about to change, and our robotic underlords are about to make […]

  2. Brittney says:

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