Firmly landing in the category of Inventions Out of the Wildest Fantasies of Madman Mundt comes the Arkeg — a classic video game console with an attached keg in its belly. Are you kidding me? This feels like some kind of cosmic joke, ready to be pulled out from underneath me at any moment. Can it be so?? Games include such arcade legends as Paperboy, Xenophobe, Total Carnage, Spyhunter, Guantlet and Marble Madness (and 61 more), but with its PC capability can upload almost any game. And the beer? Always chilled, out of a 5-gallon keg with faucet coming out of the console’s side. Wow — can you imagine rocking out to some overnight marathon sessions of Guantlet, and every time the Dungeon Master says, “Ranger needs food, baaadly!” you could just lean over, pour another tall glass of Fat Tire chilled, gulp some down, and inevitably save your hero for another battle? I mean, the possibilities of drunken glee are endless! Move over “fire”, kick rocks, “wheel” — I believe we have a new winner for Greatest Invention in the History of Mankind.

Bravo, fine gentlemen, bravo.

It’s Wifi capable, and even plays music too. I now know my life’s goal…make $3999 so I can buy one and call it my own…