Sometimes you have to wonder what Tom Brady did in a past life to warrant the life he’s had. Did he lead an uprising of lepers from a remote island prison? Did he open a culinary institute for orphans in some lost favela of Brazil? Was he the guy that slipped Daedalus the supplies so […]

This, my fodder-reading little lemurs, is what you call a scoop — something no other website knows yet. Insiders say that everyone’s favorite sizzup slurping drug dumpster, the inimitable P’tite Wheezy, was signed to act in his first major studio film, Patriots.