Say your out taking a stroll through a light drizzle, just trying to mind your business and not got in anyone’s way, when unexpectedly you start getting punked by a roving band of street ninjas. What are you gonna do, run? Throw your duck boots at them? Well if you had this handy Umbrella Sword Cane you’d be set. Not only is it crafted with a brass-knuckle-like guard handle to add a little zing to your donkey punches, but inside its shaft is a bloodletting 15″ stainless steel blade to fend off anyone who dares to screw with you. Of course its banned in fun-loving states like Massachusetts, California and New York where they look down on lethal self defense tools. But you can always ship it out to your cousin Carlos’ spot and have him send you one all discreet like. At the cost of only $30, you’d be foolish not to make the highly useful Umbrella Sword Cane yours.